The gracefulness of giving

A grateful community bid farewell to Dr. James W. Parker Jr. Saturday.

Family, friends, colleagues, and many of those he ministered to, alternately mourned his loss and celebrated the life of a great man who was father, friend, husband, healer, mentor and role model to so many in Red Bank and beyond.

“He’s been an adviser and mentor to the children, men, women of this community,” said Milton Gray, Oakhurst. “And his father was such a mentor.

“In the old days, his father delivered babies and was paid with chickens by people who didn’t have money. That’s the way his father was.”

Sitting in a pew prior to funeral services for Parker at First Presbyterian Church on Harding Road Saturday, Gray reminisced about the friend he’d grown up with.

When asked what he thought Parker’s true gift to the community had been, Gray answered without hesitation:

“Himself, his way with people; how he contributed to the town of Red Bank and the whole county. He was there for people and organizations. He took the time.

“The clinic, that’s part of his giving and he did that before the clinic. He was a doctor of humanity as much as he was a doctor of medicine.”

“All of us have memories of our experience of Dr. Parker,” said his pastor, the Rev. Milton A. Williams Jr. of Shrewsbury Avenue A.M.E. Zion Church, who spoke of Parker’s unconditional love for his fellow man and his belief in equality of health care for all.

“We celebrate the legacy of one who stood for so much in this community,” Williams said.

“What an incredible gift God gave us in bringing Dr. Parker into our community,” said Red Bank Mayor Edward J. McKenna Jr. in a tribute.

McKenna recalled walking down the street with his father as a young boy and encountering the Drs. Parker.

“My father looked at me and said, ‘Son, these men are two of the most dignified men you will ever meet. Make it your business to get to know them and appreciate them because they do more for the community than we’ll ever know.’

“He was an individual that in the history of the borough may have had the greatest impact of any single individual in town,” McKenna told the 400 people who attended the service. “We understood what a precious gift we had in Dr. Parker and we embraced him as a beacon of light in the community.”

“He was much more than a doctor,” recalled Dr. Eugene Cheslock. “He was a healer, a unifier, a bridge builder. He could heal any divisions that existed between any of us.”

“Oh, how I loved this miracle worker,” said the Rev. Dr. Donald Warner. “He was a physician, a healer, a musician, an educator. Not only that, he knew how to walk and talk. What an inspiration and role model he was and is for me.”

“This is a man who spent his life serving the least of his brethren,” said the Rev. Terrence Rosheuvel, pastor of St. Thomas Episcopal Church in Red Bank. “He had a tremendous level of service, of devotion to people. Anyone who has given like that was given not just great gifts, but a great deal of grace.”

From his place in the pew, Gray added his own affirmation: “The gracefulness of giving.”

So great was Parker’s stature in the community, that the pastors, choirs and congregations from three churches celebrated his funeral service together.

“He impacted and touched a lot of people in Red Bank,” Williams said as the service wrapped up. “His presence was so large. He was a member of our church, but he was really a member of all the churches.”